AMC charging more for better movie seats is moronic

Nicole Kidman said “We come to this place for magic” — not “for a bunch of stupid fees.”

And yet, spurning their spokeswoman, bozo movie theater chain AMC announced this week that it’s going to begin selling the best seats in its cinemas nationwide at a premium. The fleecing of you and I kicks off Friday at select locations in New York, Chicago and Kansas City before expanding to poor saps around the country.

What a terrible time for the movies to turn into Delta Airlines and charge extra for a checked bag that used to be totally free.

The theater business has still not fully rebounded to 2019 levels, even with the boffo success of “Avatar: The Way of Water,” and around that time it was already becoming totally reliant on a few Marvel and Disney titles to make a buck. AMC surely sees their lightbulb idea as fixing a cashflow problem, but really it’s yet another reason for customers to stay home and wait for “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” to hit Disney+.

AMC’s downer plan, called Sightline, unwisely takes its cues from Broadway and live concerts (where real stars perform in front of you!) by having tiered pricing based on location. Chairs closest to the screen where a two-hour film will send you to the chiropractor will cost the least; the plum center rows will go for as much as $2 more than what you’re paying now; and the value of the back and sides of the theater will stay about the same.

Members of the chain’s loyalty program, AMC Stubs, won’t have to fork over the add-on fee, but a membership costs as much as $24.95 per month. So that service only pays off for people who see a lot of movies. A 2022 Kagan survey found that 46% of Americans reported never going to the movies, while 36% said they attend once a month or less. 

So much for the good ol’ egalitarian days of movie-going where you paid the same as the next guy, and showed up early if you wanted a good spot.

Called “preferred” seating, this joins the countless other upcharges: AMC Digital, Dolby Atmos, 3D, IMAX, IMAX 3D. But at least those are for quality boosters that are a result of noticeable upgrades to the screens and sound systems. The chain hasn’t announced plans to overhaul the chairs in all 947 of its theaters in the US. So, you’ll be paying more for the exact same squeaky old seat that makes your back ache and more than likely doesn’t recline. Good luck ordering a BBQ chicken pizza and a glass of rosé.

The costs are adding up. A 3D ticket to “Avatar” costs $27.99 in NYC. Tack on $2 and you’re at $30 — for one! — before popcorn, drinks and candy.

“Lord of the Rings” actor Elijah Wood, who now mostly stars in the sort of indies that routinely struggle today, blasted the move on Twitter.

“The movie theater is and always has been a sacred democratic space for all,” he said. “This new initiative by AMC Theatres would essentially penalize people for lower income and reward for higher income.”

And it definitely dings the movies themselves, which are getting tough for average Joes to afford. With high interest rates, food costs, skyrocketing rent and more, every dollar makes a difference and a $30 film is an easy thing to slash from a budget.

Soon taking your spouse and two teens to a Marvel movie on a Friday night will set you back $120. You gotta be Nicole Kidman to afford that.