Cannes 2023 standing ovations ranked: Euphoric to embarrassing

It’s the dumbest tradition of the Cannes Film Festival: the long standing ovation.

Whether the movie is a modern classic or an assault on good taste, etiquette on the Cote d’Azur demands hopping to your feet for minutes of applause. 

So entrenched is this French farce that trade publications routinely time the euphoria and judge the response to the new films based on the length of the cheering at the Grand Théâtre Lumière. 

Cannes’ longest-ever roar? Guillermo del Toro’s “Pan’s Labyrinth,” which premiered there in 2006, at 22 minutes. 

This year’s fest is in full swing, and so is the ceaseless hand-slapping.

Here are Cannes’ standing ovations so far, from triumphant to tepid.

“Killers of the Flower Moon” — 9 minutes

The most ecstatic response to a film so far at this year’s festival, which runs until May 27, was for Martin Scorsese’s latest drama. The historical movie from Apple and Paramount brings together two popular Scorsese stalwarts, Leonardo DiCaprio and Robert De Niro, plus last year’s Best Actor Oscar winner Brendan Fraser and Jesse Plemons. Critics have been mostly enthusiastic. Vanity Fair said the film “shocks, resounds, and haunts.” However, the nine minutes of clapping might have been for the audience to stretch their legs — “Killers” is three hours and 26 minutes long. 

“May December” — 8 minutes

Cannes standing-o reports can be a bit like predicting the weather — there are different interpretations of available data. For example, of director Todd Haynes’ new drama, Deadline wrote that the audience stood for eight minutes, while Variety claimed a more modest six. Whatever the true timing, Netflix felt confident enough in the steamy Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore film from the director of “Far From Heaven” and “Carol” that they paid $11 million for the distribution rights. 

“Firebrand” — 8 minutes

Here’s where duration and approval go their separate ways. In this film, Alicia Vikander takes on the royal role of Katherine Parr, the sixth wife of King Henry VIII, who is played by Jude Law. Eight is enough to not be a source of mockery, but critics have been mixed. IndieWire awarded director Karim Aïnouz’s period piece a C+ and called it a “muted and claustrophobic movie.”

“Jeanne du Barry” — 7 minutes

Even seven minutes of woo-ing came as a surprise to many Americans, because the French “Jeanne du Barry” marked Johnny Depp’s comeback film after his sensational defamation trial against ex-wife Amber Heard. While the jury last year sided with Depp, 59, his image stateside hasn’t quite recovered from the salacious revelations made on the stand. Yet the “Pirates of the Caribbean” star is as popular as ever in France, which tends to be more willing to embrace controversial celebs. Still, his movie holds a 52% on RottenTomatoes.

“Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny” — 6 minutes

The fifth “Indy” film, starring an 80-year-old Harrison Ford, got a meh six-minute ovation and mostly mediocre reviews for its winding, time-travel plot and digitally de-aged Ford. But reports said that the crowd was on its feet for the teary-eyed legend, who also received an honorary Palme d’Or for lifetime achievement at the premiere. 

“The Idol” — 5 minutes

The hotly anticipated new HBO series from Sam Levinson (“Euphoria”) and The Weeknd, and starring Depp’s 23-year-old daughter, Lily-Rose Depp, got a drubbing in France. Variety called it a “sordid male fantasy” while the Hollywood Reporter said, “Rarely does a scene go by without the camera showing flashes of her breasts or ass.”