I hated my small body, but I gained confidence by gaining weight

For one woman, beauty isn’t only skin-deep.

A West Sussex woman realized — after significant weight loss and skin removal surgery — that she’s more confident at a bigger size.

Leah Jane lost 126 pounds to shrink from a UK size 24 (about a size 20 in the US) to a 10 (equivalent to a US 6), only to discover she still hated herself at a smaller size.

“Not enough people talk about the work you have to do (mentally) to be happy with your body,” the 39-year-old told the Sun. “The beauty standards we are held to change all the time, which means the ‘ideal’ body shape and size will do too. If you are having surgery just for that reason, I think it can be quite dangerous. Why is it going to make you happier?

“If you are having surgery to make yourself feel good mentally, it’s not going to work,” she added.

Now, at a size 12 to 14 (a US 8 to 10), she’s happier than ever.

“I understand when people message me and say, ‘I’ve had that surgery that you’ve had and I still hate my body,’” she said.

At just 23, Jane got a tummy tuck to remove “saggy skin” that came as a result of losing weight five years prior. Two years later, she got a breast lift, and at 31, she received a thigh skin tightening procedure.

While she began dieting as early as 18, finally shedding the weight and being left with an “extreme amount of loose skin” only damaged her confidence.

But over the past year and a half, she worked to become a bigger size, championing therapy and body confidence accounts online as the key to her changed mindset.

She even began her own TikTok account, detailing her mental and physical health journey and racking up nearly 36,000 followers.

In one empowering clip with 888,000 views, she aims to normalize stomach rolls, showing off her stretch marks and the way her body changes when she sits.

In the comments, fellow body-positive supporters rallied Jane’s content and message.

“That’s so true … but let’s embrace we have a little extra around our middles,” one person said.

“So normal my sister is tiny! She’s a size 4/6 and she gets rolls when sitting down. I’m a size 18 and I do too!” wrote another.

“Thank you I needed this today … I still struggle at times and just need a reminder we are all beautiful,” commented someone else.

In another video, Jane addresses a comment someone wrote, saying they had a tummy tuck and still hated how they looked.

“I believed that I was going to have this tummy tuck. I was going to look down and there was going to be a flat stomach. I was going to feel amazing,” Jane said in the clip. “Don’t get me wrong, I was so pleased with what they did and they removed so much skin. It was a flat stomach.

“I was happy with it but I still hated my body, I couldn’t work out why,” she continued, also addressing that it’s not just dieting and cosmetic surgeries that equate to health.

Instead, she said, people “have to do the work up here,” pointing to her head, “for you to be happy with yourself.”

She opened up about her eating disorder and body dysmorphia that developed after her surgeries, saying she still “detested” herself and how she looked.

“Every single day I hated myself and I wanted to change how I looked. I can completely understand when people message me and say, ‘Look, I’ve had that surgery you’ve had and I still hate my body,’” she said. “It’s not your body, it’s how you think about your body. The great news is you can change how you think about your body.”

She encouraged her viewers to change their perceptions of their bodies, not to change how they actually look.

“I’m happier with my body now than I have ever been and I’m the biggest I’ve been in a very long time,” she said.

Again, people in the comments section cheered Jane on for her honesty and encouragement, using the space to reveal their shared experiences.

“I lost 8st to. Got to 11.5st had a tummy tuck. Still hated me. Gained 3st up to a 16. Happier than I’ve ever been. Can actually eat normal now,” wrote one person.

“I could have written this. Had a band, lost 8.5st had TT. Hated my body had band emptied gained 3st feel so much better at a 16,” commented another.

Jane pleaded to her followers that the only way to turn their self-hatred around was to fix their minds — although it’s easier said than done.

“We can control our own thoughts and it’s not an easy thing to change but it is possible and you can learn to not hate your body,” Jane said. “That’s why I’m an advocate for body acceptance. Being smaller doesn’t automatically equal being happier.”